I Want The Secret To Everlasting Happiness But … I Have Some Questions

I want to be happy. Sure, everybody says they want to be happy but not everybody means it; some people like being miserable. I don’t.  I genuinely like being happy. Maybe I was born that way. I get upset when I’m not happy – so not only am I not happy, I am not happy about being not happy. It’s quite a conundrum.

My problem isn’t that I like being happy. My problem is that it’s not enough for me to just be happy; I need to know why.  So, I went to Amazon and looked up books on happiness. There are 378,359. I’m thrilled: so much to learn! I just have so many questions! For instance …

… what the hell is happiness? Is it an emotion? A state of mind? A state of being? Is it hormonal? Is it a myth cooked up by marketers so that they can sell us stuff (and more books)?

… is happiness a skill? Is it something we can learn? Like learning how to cook pasta or change a car battery?

… is happiness something everybody can have? Or is it something you’re born with? Is it something you either have or don’t have?

… can you be happy all the time? If your happiness is based on getting what you want, then probably not cos you won’t always get what you want. But it’s possible if happiness is based on … nothing.

… is happiness a laborious process?  Something we need to work towards and achieve? Or is it something that’s instant, easily attainable?

… how many types of happiness are there? How many levels are there? Am I merely happy or very happy or very very happy? Am I happy enough???

… is my happiness authentic? Am I faking it? Do I know if I’m faking it? Am I truly happy or am I just on this merry-go-round of positive self-talk?

… are some people born happier than others? And if you were born unhappy, does that mean you’ll go through life having a harder time being happy than those who were actually born happy?

…  is ignorance truly the key to bliss? Are dumb people generally happier than smart people? Kids seem to be happy all the time. Are they that way cos they just don’t know any other way to be? Are knowledge and experience the enemies of happiness?

… can you measure happiness? If you can’t, how do I know if I’m happier today than I was a year ago? If I just base it on how good I feel, that’s not very quantifiable and therefore, not very accurate, is it?

… is happiness a science? An art? How has it evolved over the years? Are we happier now compared to our ancestors? Or did they know something we don’t?

… is happiness something you chance upon when you’re not looking for it or is it the result of a series of deliberate choices?

… and if happiness is a choice, does that mean my misery is all my own fault?

… are happy people boring? Are miserable people more interesting? Would you rather be happy, well-adjusted, ordinary with little talent, or miserable but with a high IQ and kick-ass gift that’s out of this world?

… can money buy happiness? I say, hell yeah! And the people who insist that it can’t are just jealous cos they have no money.

… which is more desirable – a life of happiness or a life of passion?

… is our pursuit of happiness just another one in a long, long line of trends? You know how one minute, something’s in and every celebrity on the planet is endorsing it? Who knows – maybe one day, it’ll be hip to be miserable and our role models would be tortured poets who’d killed themselves, like Sylvia Plath.

… are we trying too hard to be happy? And in the process, making ourselves horribly unhappy? Is our desperate pursuit of happiness a … pandemic?

The answer to all these questions is: I don’t know. And while I plan to read Dan Gilbert’s book, I don’t have time to read the other 378,358. Which means I’ll probably never figure out all the answers. And that makes me rather … unhappy.